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Showing posts from April 29, 2015

Cow Farts Climate Change

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WIND BREAKING NEWS! Finally, President Barack Obama and UN Secretary-General Ban Kee Moon have admitted they got the cause of global climate change wrong. Good for them. In a joint Rose Garden press conference today, President Barack Obama and United Nations Secretary General Ban Kee Moon announced that 99.999 %    of the world’s climate scientists now agree that global warming climate change is actually caused by bovine flatulence rather than human fossil fuel consumption.  In prepared remarks given to reporters the President asserted; “Debate is over. It’s time to act decisively. I’m not a flatulentologist, but when 99.999 %  of them, all over the globe, tell me that this is true beyond doubt, then I must accept it. Moreover, methane emissions from cow flatulence, exhaling and belching is reaching catastrophic proportions and is the single most contributing factor to global warming. Therefore, I am asking Congress for 3 Trillion dollars to establish a new federal bur